VISITING HOURS: OPEN

BOOKING DESK / NIGHT SHIFT

Paste a wallet.
Get booked.

Jailbird reads a wallet's latest swaps and checks how fast it sold what it bought. Result: a rap sheet and a sentence.

BOOKING SLIPNO. 0001
A bird in a prison uniform holding a microphone in a lit cell window, with a rap sheet scroll hanging below
CELL 7, WINDOW SIDE. EVERY SWAP GOES ON THE RECORD.

HOUSE RULES

  1. Sample. The latest swaps of the wallet, up to 100.
  2. Match. Every sell is matched with earlier buys of the same token inside that sample, oldest first.
  3. Count. A sell inside 24 hours of its buy is a count. The score is counts divided by closed trades.
  4. Sentence. Under 15 percent walks free. Above 90 percent is life.

Under 10 swaps, or fewer than 3 matched sells: not enough record. Sells of tokens bought before the sample are not counted. SOL amounts are approximate. It is a joke about a wallet, not advice.